“Alex” said she was not going to spend any more of her precious time and energy thinking about what had happened with a colleague because it was making her miserable, consuming her thoughts, affecting her behaviors. She felt like she was living a façade, smiling on the outside, angry on the inside. She had a choice to make. Continue feeling this way and let it eat at her or do something different. She chose to focus on the strong relationships she has, and continues to build, within and beyond her department. And the good works she and her team are doing. This has fortified her, refueled her positive energy.
You have the same choice available to you — we all do, every day — to shift gears. Adjust your mindset. Mute the negative. Start anew. Each new day you can choose the way you look at things. Heck, you can intentionally choose to be more open minded in the midst of a conversation or meeting.
Alex made the intentional decision to continue to be and do her best, which is valued by many, and not let one person’s words and actions drag her down. When I said, “You can’t change anyone else, you can only change how you deal with, react or respond to that person,” she agreed and said, “My father used to tell me that years ago. I know it’s true, but this was hard.”
Is there something you are holding onto that is not serving you? Is there anger or frustration toward someone or something that happened? Perhaps negative thoughts or assumptions about yourself or others? Maybe it’s clutter – mental, physical, emotional – that is making you feel stuck.
Decide how you want to feel and choose the mindset that supports that feeling. It can be hard. But you are in control. No one controls your mindset but you. Your ability to change your mind is powerful.
And definitely doable.